Basketball Widow

The Season Never Ends: How to Survive the NBA Basketball Season

November 5, 2007 8:26 PM | 0 Comments

If you listen to our Sports Widow Blues theme song, you'll hear the lamenting phrase, "I'm a Sports Widow, baby, and the season never ends." The plaintiff stylings of composer/vocalist Chris Sharp ring particularly true this season. The Boston Red Sox just swept (won the first four games of) the Major League Baseball (MLB) World Series, the ballpark seats aren't even cold yet, and professional basketball and college basketball are bouncing into our lives. And, not just for a few months, but until June 2008 in the case of pro basketball. AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! That's the sound of Basketball Widows hurling themselves off their widow's walks in abject despair.

Basketball Season is a Marathon, You need a Game Plan
So, if you think Magic Johnson is a Vegas performer or a children's birthday party entertainer, you're a National Basketball Association (NBA) Sports Widow and you've got to treat this season like a marathon. You'll need a number of strategies in your playbook. Here are some general tips about how to survive the prolonged basketball season. In future postings, I'll delve into more detail.

Schedule it.Whenever possible, find out when your fan's televised games are scheduled. This is powerful, liberating information. It means you can choose to opt in or opt out.

Don't Forget to Court Each Other. Plan a regular weekly or bi-weekly date night, preferably when a major game isn't scheduled or can be recorded so that it's a win-win situation for both of you. Caution: Make sure your restaurant choice doesn't have aerial televisions or you're doomed.

Negotiate Some Strategic Trades.This is all about parity. It's OK for your sports fan to indulge his passions, but time to yourself should also be a part of the package. This can be as simple as working out at the YMCA, having a Girls Night Out, going to a movie or finding some uninhabited part of your house and reading a good book or magazine.

Get Courtside. Put superglue on one of the chairs in your family room or Sports Palace, if you have one, and challenge yourself to watch part of a game. Even to we rookies, the last five minutes are typically exciting. Refrain from multi-tasking: folding clothing or picking lint out of the carpet.

Get in the Game. Shoot some hoops with your kids. For tips on winning moves, consult my Shake 'n Bake Basketball posting. Invent your own family High-five. Practice making baskets at the grocery store, but I wouldn't try this with canned goods. Learn a little bit about basketball by reading The Smart Girl's Guide to Sports: A Hip Handbook for Women Who Don't Know a Slam Dunk from a Grand Slam

Incorporate Basketball Lingo Into Everyday Conversations. Who cares if you're using the terms accurately. Depending on how you use them, you'll either foster a deeper closeness to your basketball fan or you'll woo him into fulfilling your wildest dreams. The key is to sound natural. Here are some examples.

Speaking of hardwood, have you noticed how worn and scratched our floors are? Don't you think it's time we invested in new floors or refinished the ones we have?

Hoops. Hmmm. That reminds me, there's a jewelry sale at Nordstrom's this weekend.

Speaking of coaches, I would really love a Coach handbag for Christmas. Or, look at the coach's suit. With Cousin Courtney's wedding coming up, maybe we should stop by Men's Wearhouse to pick out a new one for you.

Speaking of dribbling, I think it's your turn to feed junior his Gerber strained peas and carrots tonight.

Speaking of dunks, let's go to Dunkin' Doughnuts for an old fashioned. (Don't do this too many times or you'll begin to resemble a basketball.)

Lastly, next time you're sitting in bed finishing up the Crossword Puzzle, boast that you know there are (5) basic positions in basketball...Well, you never know where this could lead you.

After all, life is a contact sport. Wink. Wink. Nudge. Nudge.

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The Sports Widow
(aka Nan Hall)